Open Communication

by Jackie
(Texas)

If you can't be open and honest with the person you're dating, then is that person worth dating? This doesn't mean that you are to share all your personal information at once, but it does mean that you are to discuss each others' 'rulebooks' for dating. This ensures that you are both on the same page. You don't want to find out when you're alone with your date that he/she has lower standards about intimacy than you do; that's a good way to get yourself in a compromising situation that you would regret later.

For example, a Christian couple I know started dating in November, 2008. They made it a point to discuss limitations on certain things, such as flirting. It was the guy who let his girlfriend know that they needed to be careful of how they kiss, because it could lead to tempting thoughts for him--and he didn't want to dishonor himself, his date, or God by having impure thoughts. She agreed to those boundaries, and they've had a wonderful relationship since then (they are engaged now, and planning on marrying in May, 2011!), because they've both started talking and communicating about things early on in their relationship.

Make sure you can talk to the person you're dating. If you can't, or you find out that the other person has different standards than you, then you should reconsider your choice. You can't have an honest relationship if you can't talk to each other.